2025 CHAMPIONSHIP GAME
1. The Sneaky Greek v. 6. Sloppy Joe - The two highest scoring teams met in the title game of our 15th season of the Cowboys Suck Fantasy Football League, and of course it was a rematch of the infamous Stat Correction-Tiebreaker Title Game with Zack and Joe facing off with the Pacman Jones Memorial Trophy on the line for the second time in league history. Zack had half of his team play on Christmas Thursday or Saturday Night Football and had mixed feelings with a 45 point game from Derrick Henry and pretty much nothing else from all his Lions and Cowboys - which was most of his offense. Sloppy Joe, meanwhile, had most of his team playing in the later window or on SNF and MNF, so he just sat around watching the Greeks flail all day before ultimately starting George Kittle on SNF, who didn’t play due to injury, and got Zack a bagel that sealed his fate. A brutal 150 point showing from the Greeks is a rough ending to what had been one of the more dominant seasons the league has ever seen, a big surprise to everyone after he drafted nothing but fossils during the entire draft. Turns out that Kittle, Henry, Davante Adams, and somehow Jacoby Brissett still had enough left in the tank to get the Greeks to the championship game for the 3rd time in franchise history. At the end of the day, it was Sloppy Joe coming up big for the franchise’s second ever title - with both victories coming against Zack - in what has become a great playoff rivalry between these two East Division foes. Joe used his dual stacks of Stafford-Puka and Purdy-CMC to propel him to the title, even if it did have a few unset lineup L’s along the way. Ultimately, though, it’s the end result that matters, and that end result is that Sloppy Joe is the 2025 CSFFL Champion!
ELIMINATED!
2. The Sneaky Greek - A heartbreaking loss featuring an injured player in the starting lineup gave the Greeks a tough ending to what had been a fairytale run through the regular season with a team of veterans no more than a year or two away from retirement across the lineup. After blowing out everybody in the regular season and the semifinals, Zack collapsed completely in the championship game when it mattered most and took the L to miss out on his second ever franchise title. ELIMINATED!
3. The Kosher Nostra - Team Wisconsin established a new league record this year with the franchise’s 6th divisional title to break a tie with the Ganja Farmers for most all time, but it was all for naught with a miserable 141 point showing in the semifinals to lose to the 6-seed. Mike also was the 6th highest scoring team on the season despite winning the division, so it was a well deserved L in a season where everything ended in a 6 for packer boy. ELIMINATED!
4. Q - An inconsistent regular season saw Q put up the 3rd lowest points in the entire league during the regular season but still parlaying that into the 4-seed and a home playoff game with an 8-6 record. He then proceeded to blow Nikki out in the wild card round with 236 points, and then followed that up by somehow scoring 100 points less than that in the semis with a brutal 135 point loss. ELIMINATED!!
5. HI-Life Ganja Farmers - Djavan’s heartbreaking run continues as a brutal showing in the wild card round comes after he missed out on the divisional title and a first round bye due to the tiebreaker rule after an 11-3 regular season. Alas, AutoJoe was too much as the Ganja Farmers are left waiting for that elusive first title for yet another year and are ELIMINATED!!
6. The Toll Booth - A brutal loss against Q ended a bizarre season for the Toll Booth, where she finished with the lowest points scored in the league on the regular season but still somehow qualified for the playoffs. A loss against Q in the wild card round ended her year after she swept him during their two games this season, so karma does in fact appear to be a bitch as she is ELIMINATED!!
7. Commissioner Stalin - How obvious was this? The Soviets lost two (2) games in the first 4 weeks of the season due to stat corrections on Wednesday night, and are eliminated before week 14 even starts due to tiebreaker. Even if Stalin wins and the 6-seed loses, Stain is still out due to H2H tiebreaker. Would’ve been a lot better if the H2H win was a stat correction win, but alas. ELMINATED!!!!!
8. Coach Rubs - DAWG all I had to do was set lineups and I woulda been in the playoffs for the 2nd straight season? Instead I’m 5-9? Thas bullshit dawg if only they had a button on the app to automatically set your full lineup for you. ELIMINATED!
Fun fact: all 4 of Logan’s wins this season except the nonsense final week one have come when he has scored over 200 points. He has scored under 200 points in every other game and lost all of them
9. The Law Firm - Our league counsel is 3-11 and tied with Brock, but he lucked out by Brock also losing his final game and beating the Boof in week 8 to win the H2H tiebreaker for not last place despite a 3-11 record. Either way, he’s ELIMINATED!
10. Boof - Brock was coming off of his 2nd title in just 3 seasons after many years of waiting, and he’s gonna wait some more after injuries decimated his lineup and he is ELIMINATED(!) from playoff contention. He’s currently 3-11 after a big win and is tied with our next team for last place but loses the H2H tiebreaker and has to pay trophy shipping, which stings extra since he is also defending champ and currently has the trophy. ELIMINATED!!!!!!!
On top of this, most of you clowns haven’t paid. PAY JOE NOW!!!!!
WHO HAS PAID
Commissioner Stalin
Boof
The Sneaky Greek
The Kosher Nostra
WHO HASN’T PAID
Q
Sloppy Joe
HI-Life Ganja Farmers
The Law Firm
The Toll Booth
Coach Rubs
