2026 Regular Season - Week 8
PAY YOUR DUES PEASANTS!!
Week 7 recap
Cooper DePeen vs. Sloppy Joe - AutoJoe had a guy on the IR in his starting lineup, and believe it or not luck didn’t go his way this time as the Law Firm dropped the highest score of the week behind a monster 35 point game from…Tony Pollard? Despite the injured guy in the lineup, Joe still managed to score 193 points behind Joe Burrow and Bucky Irving - which would’ve beat everyone in the league except Brock or Anthony this week as the third highest score we had on the slate - but he couldn’t get past the legend Ryan Flournoy and the Law firm offense. The Commissioner prediction proved correct with Anthony moving to 4-3 and giving Sloppy Joe his first L of the season, although he still sits atop the East Division at 6-1
The Kosher Nostra vs. HI-Life Ganja Farmers - The Ganja Farmers actually set a lineup this week, which is key, but it ultimately wasn’t enough to get a result as a full starting lineup produced just 150 points in a game against the last remaining undefeated team in the league. This was a winnable game for Djavan, with Mike failing to even break the 170 point plateau with some mediocre outings across his lineup, but Jahan Dotson and Wan’Dale Robinson were not enough to pull it off against CMC and Puka Nacua. Mike remains undefeated at 7-0 as he drops Djavan to 2-5 and quickly sliding towards trophy shipping territory
Soviet Union vs. ELEFTHERIOS the Conquerer - The Eastern Front provided a pretty epic battle this week between the Soviets and the Greeks, with the game legitimately coming down to MNF with both teams only having their punters left. This is very likely the first game in league history that has come down to MNF with each team having the punter on the two teams playing on Monday with the game on the line, and unfortunately for Zack he came out on the short end of another heartbreaking battle yet again. Eagles punter Braden Mann outscored Cowgirl Bryan Anger, but Anger and the Soviets had the last laugh as Anger scored just enough to give Stalin a 2 pont victory that somehow withstood the infamous Wednesday night stat correction. Zack drops to 2-5 on the season while the Soviets bounce back after a brutal loss to Logan and are now 3-4
Magicman and El Deablo vs. Rich NaNnon - Brock continued his roll this week, putting up 199 points or more for the 4th time in the last 5 weeks in a big win over Q. Brock had solid games from JSN and Geno Smith, which is obvious after I ripped him in the weekly preview, but the real story here was 44 points out of his LBs with both of them dropping 22 in big wins for their IRL teams. Q’s defense struggled this week with a lot of single digit point outings, and he only had one 20 point game in the starting lineup to ultimately finish with an average score and a tough loss. Q falls to 4-3 as Brock moves to 5-2 to keep pace in the East
Popeye’s Chicken and Biscuits Game of the Week MMMMM GOOOOD
Power of the Pussy vs. Mooseknuckle - The Game of the Week didn’t disappoint, with Logan starting and injured WR in Emeka Egbuka and Nikki actually setting a full lineup but still somehow losing and putting up just 146 points with a full starting lineup. Logan was led by Emmanuel Wilson and Tre Tucker, because who else would be scoring at this point, while Nikki failed to turn a 20 point outing from Rhamondre Stevenson into anything of substance with single digit scores peppered throughout her lineup. Logan somehow finds himself on a winning streak and is now 2-5 while Nikki drops to 0-7 and is firmly in trophy shipping territory
Bold Play of the Week presented by Markal Lumber Crayon
Boof wins the Bold Play Award for week 7 for Geno Smith, who I ripped in the preview just for him to drop 23 in a huge Brock victory
Scoop of the Week presented by Tostitos Scoops
The Scoop of the Week easily goes to the Law Firm for snagging FHOF Ryan Flournoy, who provided a solid 9 points in a 220 point outburst at the courthouse
YOU BLEW IT Player of the Week presented by Adam Sandler
Joe blew it this week, starting a guy on the IR and taking his first L of the season. Also Nikki. Nikki’s team is so bad
.Week 8 preview
Mooseknuckle vs. Cooper DePeen - Incredibly, Logan is just one game back of a playoff spot despite having the worst team we’ve seen in recent memory. He’s playing the Law Firm, who is coming off a massive 220 point outing against AutoJoe. Look for Logan to get smoked again here
HI-Life Ganja Farmers vs. Magicman and El Deablo - Djavan has a lineup, which is a good start, but Q is rolling out maybe the best QB combo we’ve seen this season in Danny Dimes and Diddles Watson. Djavan might have enough in him to pull it off, but will Jahan Dotson be enough? Why is he still starting him???
ELEFTHERIOS the Conquerer vs. Power of the Pussy - Nikki has four (4) guys in her lineup that aren’t playing. Zack with a lollipop W here
Rich NaNnon vs. Soviet Union - Boof seems to be on the Geno Smith revenge tour, so look for him to drop 50 points in a massive game to blow out the Soviets, who are coming off of an awful loss to Coach Rubs and the injured boys. Boof by a thousand
Popeye’s Chicken and Biscuits Game of the Week MMMMM GOOOOD
Sloppy Joe vs. The Kosher Nostra - A great mid-season battle here between the two division leaders pits 6-1 AutoJoe vs. 7-0 Meyer ‘Mike’ Lansky, in a game that very well might be a preview of the 2026 title game. Joe took the injured guy out of his lineup from last week, which will likely help, but no matter what this game is gonna be a shootout. Both squads have guys on MNF, so look for it to come down to the wire here in a battle of the top two scoring teams on the season. This screams Joe stat correction